Saturday, June 29, 2013

Culling My Friends List

Perhaps I was inspired by my recent experience of being removed from a friends list, but I have now done the same thing with my own.

When going through my friends list before starting the culling, I noticed that I had been removed from others friends lists already, most notable was my removal by the now abdicated queen of Swedish SecondLife which quite possibly was due to an altercation concerning whether I - as a "Friendly helper" in her group - should do as she ordered me or follow my own discretion. I am well aware that my kind manners sometimes misleads people into thinking that I am submissive, but frankly I do not take orders well so I left that group, thus relieving myself of any duties or obligations in the group she had created.

I have not culled my friends list for a very long time, except about a year and a half ago when I removed one person by accident and another by design. The thing that happened then was that I intended to remove a certain person but for some reason beyond me - possibly someone logging in or out of SecondLife - ended up removing the queen of a neighboring Scandinavian country in SecondLife by mistake.

When I immediately called her in Instants Message to explain my mistake the queen was naturally enraged by my action. She did not at all  believe my protestations and assurances that her removal was a mistake. I have learned that it is futile to discuss such matters further while someone is still furious so I left it at that, although I had first called her up to add her as a friend again.

So learning from previous mistakes and after due consideration I started on removing people from my list. The criterias for removing that I had made up in my mind were the following:
  • I do not know who the person was
  • I cannot remember ever communicating with the person.
  • I have not had any communications with the person during the last three (3) years.
  • The person has blocked me from seeing when they are in-world (2 persons).
  • The person is a bastard that I will not wish to communicate with in the future(3 person).
Reasons to keep someone on the list inspite of the above criterias being met:
  • The person is one I have a strong sentimental attachment to although he never logs in anymore (1 person)
Following the criterias I - carefully making sure I got the correct person - started removing people. I have now successfully concluded this project and have cut my friends list down from 278 to 149 persons. I find it to be a great relief and much less stressful to see only people I care about on my list.

If you still see me on your list, Congratulations! You're still in the running to be Southern Charms next Royal Consort.

And if you don't see me on your list anymore, Congratulations, you are rid of me! I hope you have a happy and fulfilling SecondLife.

If you wish to appeal the decision please send your written appeal in triplicate to
Supreme Court of the United States
1 First Street, NE
Washington, DC 20543


  1. Get ready Bock! For those IM's that read something like this:

    Dear Bock:

    I know we were good friends in the past (even though you have not communicated with the person in the past 16 months). I know that you meant much to me at one point (you got his friendship request out of the clear blue one day without the person even saying hello to you). But I just saw that you decided to cut me from your friends list (the person values his self worth by reviewing his list every minute of the day). Although you never told me why you cut me for your list (you sent 3 messages beforehand that you were doing this), I want to know I still value our friendship, and will be slitting my wrists and killing myself with sign attached to my body blaming you for my death.

    Get ready!!! It's coming!

    1. ROFL I have already, in the post, left instructions what and where to appeal my decision. so I will refer them to this post.

      As a matter of fact, I was not as kind as you and did not send out warnings. So I may get bashed on for that, but I will make my excuses for the bad form but still maintain they follow the assigned appeals process if they have any objections.

  2. Runs off to check if I made the cut.

    1. Congratulations, dear sir! You're still in the running to be the next Royal Consort of Southern Charms. ;)

  3. Aw man, there was a contest for Queens of Neighboring Counties and I missed it! I wasnt even on the nominations list! :D

    People will find drama where there is none. Its your friends list. Do with it what you want, man. :)

    1. Nope, you had to be Scandinavian to get nominated in the first place, but the battle was hard and fierce and we all walked around knee-deep in blood and gore for a while - so be happy and thankful that you missed it!

      Well, somehow certain people feel they have a vested interest in my friends list, I cannot imagine what gave them that idea...

      Thanks for the closing advice, Nigel, I will follow it in the future!

  4. yay i made the cut;) or didnt get cut however you see it hehe:) i too do clean my list sometimes...its not a contest to see whos got the biggest friend list cos no one can see who are on you list anyway(which i think is good)
    well back to eating cake and stuff for me ...hugs:)

    1. Yes of course you did, there was never any risk I was dropping you or your hubby, sweetheart!

      Congratulations, dear madam (and your sweet hubby)! You're both still in the running to be the next Royal Consort of Southern Charms. ;)

  5. Curious if I made the cut as well..

    1. Hey Jordyn, my friend - and I do consider you to be that, it's great to hear from you again! ;)

      Let me tell you this, you are not on my friends list in SecondLife, but I am not sure you ever were. I have no memory of removing you from my friends list in SecondLife, and am unsure if we were friends there. We are however still friends on Google+ (you as Josh Carnell) and we were friends on Facebook (until I deleted my account there).

      If you were on my SecondLife friends list, bearing in mind my strict application of the set criterias and that the only exception I made was for Ars, I am afraid you wouldn't have made the cut as I have no memory of communicating with you in-world for the last three years.

      Should you ever become active in SecondLife again, you are for certain one of the people I would thoroughly love to add back (if you would have me seeing how brutally I may have chopped you off).


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