Thursday, March 28, 2013


Is there anyone still out there?

Waking up today from the feverish, cough-ridden and pitiful condition I have been in the last couple of days, I still feel a bit weak and am wondering what can have happened to the world when I have not been able to be around and take care of things and guide you all.
"Le laird aux camélias - self portrait" (2013) 
Artwork by Bock McMillan
based on a photograph by an unknown photographer
Looking back it has been a couple of horrible days. I have strange bruises on my body and can remember fainting on at least two separate occasions, almost fainting about 123 times (but I managed to get hold of a door post or something else firm or could huddle down to the floor before all the oxygen had left my system) or finding myself crawled up in a couch,  in bed or sitting on the floor in a fetal position with my neck bowed to the front and my arms and legs drawn up against my torso in a rigid cramp.

I took a cab to my appointment with my sweet Hungarian doctor yesterday, because I was too afraid of getting a cough attack while driving. He was rather calm and casual about my vivid descriptions of my condition since the onset of the flu on Friday. "My dear man", he said kindly and calmly, "you need a cough suppressant, because with your coughing attacks you are forcing the air out of your body instead of sucking it in." He gave me a prescription for my favorite medication of all time Cocillana etyfin.

The most dramatic aspect of my present condition taken care of we could move on to the rest. 

I feel mentally and emotionally stronger and the antidepressants seem to be working well in keeping me stable.

To my complaints about my diminishing eyesight he suggested I call the specialist that had examined  and diagnosed my cataract and tell her what I was telling hem, that my eyesight was getting worse and that as a lawyer I actually needed to be able to read and write to work, not in five or then years time but now. He could not make the specialist change her mind, but if she called him and asked his opinion - as she very well might do - he would support me.

The visit over with I went home and pottered around looking sexy in my boxers grabbing hold of the walls and door posts from time to time but feeling better and did not faint any more. This morning I woke up after a good nights sleep and felt that the fever had finally left. 

Oh, did I tell you I love my old Hungarian healer?


  1. Hope you will feel better soon... I miss you Bockilein xoxoxo

  2. STOP FUGGING SMOKING or I will come up behind you and whip your boxers around your ankles and throw you into the crowded streets where the general public will leer and cat-call with horribly rude and suggestive, inappropriate comments.
    You will then be hung by the neck in a court of law, until you cheer up. ;-)
    Seriously bitch GET BETTER and stop moaning. xxxx

  3. Thanks guys, I am getting there.

    Ziggy darling, simmer down now will ya? I am considering to stop smoking with the love and support of my friends and family but not if there is going to be brutish yelling at me or public ridicule! Just so you know!

    Hugs sweeties!

  4. 7 months for me now and going strong. Nothing can make me start smoking again (obviously :-(...)
    It took me years of trying but it finally will stick if you want it bad enough.

    1. I am full of admiration for the strength of character and stamina you have shown in this Ziggy.

      I hope to be able to rely on your support in a similar effort soon, but do not rush me... ;)


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