The Accidental Drama Queen (Updated)

"Wherein this avatar´s fates, adventures and experiences in, his thoughts and feelings about and his reactions to his first and second life are depicted with written messages, images and other visual tools."

That blog description has been at the top of Bock in SecondLife from the beginning, at first in Swedish and later translated to English. In spite of that, I have on more than one occasion been accused of being a "drama queen", i.e. (according to the Urban Dictionary) "an overly dramatic person" or "someone who turns something unimportant into a major deal. Someone who blows things way out of proportion when ever the chance is given", for doing exactly what I promise to do namely express my reactions, feelings and thoughts on things that happen to me or move me in some way.

Giving me that epithet is of course an easy and accessible resort for anyone who wishes to disparage or belittle me or what I have to say.

My intentions with blogging have from the start been to give a truthful account of what happens to me, in SecondLife and first life. I am always aware of the fact that another witness to the same events can have a completely different view on the matter, but it is not my responsibility to take an objective approach and I have never claimed to be an objective onlooker. 

What you get on this blog is my personal and unique take, if it upsets you it is your problem and not mine. However, that being said, I have always been prepared to accept that not everyone shares my perspective and have been ready to listen to their version of "the truth or what actually happened".

I don´t take shit from anyone and it is not in my nature to look away or walk away from matters that upset me. I will offer my thoughts and advice freely and lavishly, it is up to the receiver if they wish to accept it.

I realize that you may wonder what brought on this diatribe and I have decided to share it with you. Yesterday I received two e-mails from "the other person" that I mention in my post Misplaced Loyalty. In the first e-mail he/she claimed utter incomprehension to my reaction for "that trifling action" she/he had taken (which only showed that he/she had not read or understood what I had tried to tell him/her because I had been careful to clearly outline my views on the matter).

In the second e-mail he/she had willfully misinterpreted and taken out of context a part of a sentence from my first e-mail to him/her in the matter. I had told him/her that I did not know what I was going to do about our relationship in the future but would decide when I had cooled down. Now he/she had clipped out "I do not know what I will do" and asked me if this was a cry for help, i.e. suggesting that I had threatened committing suicide. 

Let me tell you all, I am in a stable emotional and mental frame of mind. I have never had any suicidal tendencies, although I do understand that some people at times can find themselves in a desperate situation where they do not see any another option. If I should ever get close to that point it will not be over something trivial.

Of course I could always write a blog along these lines:
"Day1. I woke up after a good nights sleep. Coffee and ham sandwiches for breakfast. Went to work. Came home from work and logged in to SecondLife. Logged out and went to bed.
Day 2. Woke up after a good nights sleep. Coffee and cheese sandwiches for breakfast. Went to work. Came home from work and logged in to SecondLife. Logged out and went to bed. Etc., etc., etc." 

But that is nothing I like reading and would not enjoy writing either.

In conclusion, I would like to say that I do not try to create drama or thrive on it (rather it makes me uncomfortable), but when drama seeks me out I will not back away from it. In my mind, life is interesting and life is drama but I am no drama queen as such, even if I  may admit to sometimes being an "accidental drama queen".

Update
I have received complaints via e-mail from "the other person" that he/she doesn't completely agree with my depiction of what happened and wishes me to correct it. 

My response to him/her was that I have given a complete and accurate account of what has happened but that he/she is welcome to leave his/her version in the comments (even anonymously if he/she wished) and that I have no interest or intention whatsoever of discussing my blogposts with him/her via e-mail.

Wonderful Crazy

(via J.M.G.)

From Matt Harding´s website "Where The Hell is Matt" (url)

Matt is a 35-year-old deadbeat from Connecticut who used to think that all he ever wanted to do in life was make and play videogames. Matt achieved this goal pretty early and enjoyed it for a while, but eventually realized there might be other stuff he was missing out on. In February of 2003, he quit his job in Brisbane, Australia and used the money he'd saved to wander around Asia until it ran out. He made this site so he could keep his family and friends updated about where he is.

A few months into his trip, a travel buddy gave Matt an idea. They were standing around taking pictures in Hanoi, and his friend said "Hey, why don't you stand over there and do that dance. I'll record it." He was referring to a particular dance Matt does. It's actually the only dance Matt does. He does it badly. Anyway, this turned out to be a very good idea.

A couple years later, someone found the video online and passed it to someone else, who passed it to someone else, and so on. Now Matt is quasi-famous as "That guy who dances on the internet. No, not that guy. The other one. No, not him either. I'll send you the link. It's funny."

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I cannot help loving wonderful people who get crazy with the joy of life! It kind of reminds me of SecondLife, half the time I am in there I seem to be dancing my ass off.

Justice Denied

guardian.co.uk has interviewed the legal representative of the two Swedish women in the Assange-investigation and give us the following report: Julian Assange asylum move is ´a tragedy´ for his accusers, says lawyer (url full interview) :

"Julian Assange's decision to seek asylum in Ecuador is "a tragedy" for the two women who have accused him of sexual assault in Sweden, their lawyer has said.

Claes Borgström, who represents the two unnamed women with whom the WikiLeaks founder had sexual relations in Stockholm in August 2010, told the Guardian the women were frustrated and disappointed by Assange's decision to seek asylum rather than face investigation in Sweden over claims of rape, sexual molestation and unlawful coercion.

"They are disappointed, but they are getting used to this by now," said Borgström, who has represented the women throughout Assange's sequence of appeals against extradition in the British courts.

"They know that all they can do is wait. I have told them I am not sure, but I think he will still be extradited … it is a tragedy for the women. I don't know how long it will take for him to be extradited now. Victims want to put these things behind them in order to be able to get on with their lives. The tragedy is that he doesn't take his responsibility. He should have come to Sweden."

...

I totally agree with Mr. Borgström, justice delayed is justice denied for the two women.

Given the constant problem with most sexual crime allegations, that there are only two people present with conflicting versions of what occurred,  this may be a difficult case for the prosecutor to gather enough proof to bring charges against Assange and then to get him convicted by a court of law. I - like everyone else - do not yet know what supporting evidence the prosecutor may be in possession of. Delays are usually not at all helpful in crime investigations.

Swedish Government Web-pages are Down (Updated)(Update)

I have been trying to reach the Swedish governments web-pages (www.regeringen.se and others) during the last hour or so but cannot get connected with it. I have also tried getting to the different ministries without luck.

Is this a hacker attack by Assangistas?

Update
As you can read in the comments to this post the lairds CTO, Mrs. Vampi Twine-DeSantis-McMillan-McMillan (honorary), says she has no problems at all reaching the website.

However I still cannot reach the government website or those of the ministries. Of course it is entirely possible that the government has decided to shut me out but...  Could Vampi be a CIA-agent? (Go away, paranoia!)

I would appreciate if you could tell me in comments if you have a problem reaching the website www.regeringen.se or not. Thanks in advance!

Update 2
Thanks to those of you who tried to help out. Its obviously NOT a hacker attack but some malfunction on my end.

After uninstalling and re-installing my Internet Security program, my anti-virus program, my Chrome, my Firefox etc. and clearing out every conceivable cache, I must report I still cannot access the government websites in either Firefox, Google Chrome or IE. I´ll see if i have the stamina to worry about it in the morning.

Political Asylum

The embassy of the Republic of Ecuador to the United Kingdom today issued the following statement:

"This afternoon Mr Julian Assange arrived at the Ecuadorian Embassy seeking political asylum from the Ecuadorian government. We have immediately passed his application on to the relevant department in Quito. While the department assesses Mr Assange's application, Mr Assange will remain at the embassy, under the protection of the Ecuadorian government. (...) The decision to consider Mr Assange's application for protective asylum should in no way be interpreted as Ecuador interfering in the judicial processes of either the United Kingdom or Sweden."

Read the full report by Beatrice Woolf of the guardian.co.uk, "Julian Assange seeking asylum in Ecuadorian embassy in London." (url)
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Another imaginative and interesting development in this case to further delay the investigation into the criminal charges complaints for rape and sexual molestation made against Assange by two Swedish women. 

Misplaced Loyalty

Art by Rene Magritte

For a very long time I have loyally stood alongside another person. In some instances I have fought for this persons causes or defended this person against attacks. I have done so of my own volition and never expected any reward or acknowledgement for it.

However, neither did I expect my loyalty to be disrespected or taken advantage of. It was a sad moment indeed when I realized what had occurred and learned that the same thing had happened repeatedly during the last week.

In hindsight I do not regret my previous actions, but still I cannot help feeling hurt and betrayed.

I Miss Us

I have always been fiercely individual and have rarely been prepared to, or wanted to, adapt to what is expected of togetherness and in relationships. I have guarded my freedom to do whatever I wished whenever I wished to do it and to let no one hold me back. And then Ars happened.

The first eight months of my SecondLife I had successfully fended off all relationships and offers of partnering, I just could not understand how such a thing as a virtual love affair or relationship could ever work, either in the.short run or in the long run. And then Ars happened.

It was actually very strange when I found myself to be so dependent on another man, his moods, his schedules, his wishes. Someone once told me during an argument that I was lucky meeting Ars when I did. I agreed with him and did not think about his statement anymore until after Ars had passed away. I know I asked him at some point then, but I cannot recall his answer - it all happened during the blurriest part of my grieving.

Still, I do agree with the guy. I was lucky in meeting Ars when I did. What we had and what we became together just grew naturally and I never felt it as a limitation or an obstacle, rather the opposite. Ars supported me, lifted me, taught me and guided me. I guess I did something for him also, but I cannot imagine what I did to be showered with such affection and love.

I miss our talks, jokes, discussions and even our quarrels. Ars thought I was too naive and overly kind to everyone and too political. I was upset with him for having given up on the political process altogether and sometimes for working too much and for being a cynic and not taking care of himself. I miss sharing ideas, dreams and thoughts with him.  I miss being loved.

I miss "us", I miss "we" and I miss being a part of "Ars and I".