EXCLUSIVE Laird Confesses; "I Use Windlights"

The Much Honored Bock McMillan, laird of Southern Charm, prince of Cascade Falls, Sovereign Ruler of the Commonwealth of Southern Enchantment Region and Outer Territories and finally UN appointed Protector of the Mount Whitney sim in SecondLife, today made a surprising confession during an exclusive interview for this blog.

"Turn Away from the Light" by Bock McMillan

"During most of my life I have been fascinated by photography. When I came into SecondLife some eight years ago I was thrilled by the handy photo-tool in the various viewers. I have used them to the fullest throughout my existence here.  Until recently I have always worked with the natural or preexisting light settings on the sim I have been on, but lately - under the influence of my consort H.R.H. Prince Tomais, I'm sure - I have begun playing around with the Windlight settings when I take pictures. 

"As I am not an accomplished photographer like the prince of my heart, but a mere snap-shooter the extent of "my art" until lately has consisted of snapping the picture at an angle I like and then do some creative cropping. Now I have started playing with the Windlight settings too, just like I have always teased Tomais for doing, but it takes me even longer than it does for Tomais because I have to go through them twice before I can decide on which light I like best.

With a slight shudder a a beautiful blush on his cheeks, the laird continued "I felt a need to make this shocking revelation considering how I have been teasing Tomais for his trying out of all Windlight settings and then some (he has a shitload of extra settings that don't come with the viewers). I have considered founding a Windlight Anonymous (WA), but I am not sure if I will go through with those plans."

All three pictures in this post were shot by the laird himself at the IN SILICO sim. The outfit is The Soft Suit from Shu Mesh and the poses are by Finn Millar and Spencer Roncales of Vice Poses.

A Linguistic Mishap

This is a difficult confession, as I have always prided myself of my command of the English language, so I will use my alter-ego when sharing this glimpse into my life with you.

The laird. Photography by J.J. Goodman

The Much Honored Bock McMillan, laird of Southern Charm, prince of Cascade Falls, Sovereign Ruler of the Commonwealth of Southern Enchantment Region and Outer Territories and finally UN appointed Protector of the Solace Island and Mount Whitney sims in SecondLife, was laying in bed with his beloved consort Tomais a few nights ago. (The Solace Island sim no longer enjoys the protection of the laird.)

Earlier the same day the laird had been cleaning out his Inventory and reduced it from 30,430 items to 25,643 by deleting a whole lot of system clothing (except a few who had sentimental value to him). He was pleased with his accomplishment and was now thinking of the next step to take after he had culled his objects folder, his textures folder, his snapshots folder, his note cards folder and his landmarks folder. (Although he himself emphatically maintains otherwise, he really isn't the most patient man in SecondLife, as you can establish from his skipping the arduous work still remaining with the aforementioned folders.)

The laird had, ever since he heard of his consorts neat and well-organized Inventory, wanted to learn how to organize his own Inventory in a similar way so that he would be better able to find what he was looking for and no longer having to rely on dumb luck or that he remembered the correct name of an item. Even though the laird himself is not a pedantic man by nature, he (most likely through his upbringing and his meticulous parents) has always held a deep and lasting admiration for well-organized people, although he tries to hide that fact and talks rather disdainfully about it. He was therefor very eager to learn from his lover how to organize his Inventory better.

But I am procrastinating, onward with this gory confession.

The laird and his consort. Photography by J.J. Goodman

With those thoughts in his mind, the laird turned to his consort and said - in his usual rather bossy way, "Next weekend you really must show me your anal content..."

The laird was not at all prepared for the rumbustious and boisterous laughter that erupted from his lover before he could complete his sentence. He was rather taken aback and wondered what had happened until his lover, still laughing loudly and heavily. managed to squeeze in a coherent sentence, "You want me to show you my shit?"

At which point the laird blushed (which he rarely does) and started stammering that that was indeed not the request he wished to express at all.

After my lover had calmed down, he related a story about his mother who committed a similar faux-pas at a social gathering and very kindly pointed out that such unfortunate occurrences do happen and although embarrassing are never fatal. A while later, once the laird had collected himself, they could both laugh at it.

It´s time for a confession

I need to come clean with something to you all, because I want you to read it here first.

There is a person whom I have told about this. At the time when I told her I thought of  her as a friend, but we have since parted ways and broken all contact. Still she keeps on baiting me on almost a daily basis and I am just waiting for her to "spill the beans". I do not wish to be afraid anymore, so here goes.

After my husband Ars passed away I was diagnosed with clinical depression.

Clinical depression is a serious medical illness that negatively affects how you feel, the way you think and how you act.

I was unable to function as I used to and lost interest in activities that were once enjoyable to me. I felt sad and hopeless for extended periods of time. Clinical depression is not the same as feeling sad or depressed for a few days and then feeling better. It affected my body, my mood, my thoughts, and my behavior. It changed my eating habits, how I felt and how I thought, my ability to work and how I interacted with people. In short I did not "feel like myself" anymore.

Clinical depression is not a sign of personal weakness, or a condition that can be willed away. Clinically depressed people cannot "pull themselves together" and get better. In fact, clinical depression often interferes with a person's ability or wish to get help. Clinical depression is a serious illness that lasts for weeks, months and sometimes years. Mental health counselors and psychiatrists are trained to diagnose and treat clinical depression. With the right treatment, most people who seek help get better within several months. Many people begin to feel better in just a few weeks.

I am grateful to my boss for forcing me to seek medical help at an early stage already in May 2010, and for the support I have since received from her, from my co-workers, from my true friends and family in real life and in Second Life. I have been receiving medical treatment for this since May and mostly I feel much better and stronger although not quite my old self yet.

I am relieved that I have now come to the decision to tell you myself rather than wait for it to be hurled out on another blog.