Harmony vs. Discord

Today I read an interesting post by Spike Clémenceau-Silent on his blog Sex & Second Life. The post is entitled Gossip, Pride, Lies, half truths and other monsters.

In the post Spike makes an analysis of this years Second Pride campaign and the shortcomings we have witnessed in the process and or the candidates or their followers, and what he believes are the shortcomings of Second Pride.as a concept, or as Spike calls it "a plattform". Spike concludes his post with these words "If you really want to do some change and do some good, do the hard work and leave the dirty politics and drama, to those who only seek recognition and praise."

I agree with much of what Spike has to say concerning what we have seen during the campaign from anonymous bloggers, alts in the forums etc. Some of the people in the forums (and many other places too) have been eager to air dirty laundry of one or the other candidate and have shown an inability to separate between the candidate's personal lives and hers/his actions, opinions, thoughts and ideas. Of course the candidates historical activity and opinions matter when we try to decide whether or not we can or should trust them, but that doesn't mean we want to hear from all their ex-lovers airing their grievances or other similar mudslinging.

However, I fundamentally disagree with Spike's conclusions. I do not believe that discord is something bad or evil, that politics are dirty or that the clash of ideas and opinions are inherently bad or are worthy to be labeled "drama", the word we all dread so much in the harmony-centric world of SecondLife. I wrote a post about this about a year and a half ago, please read it, Should SecondLife be "Pleasantville"?.

In short I believe in Second Pride. I also believe in elected officers and a democratic election process where the candidates need to inform the electorate about their visions and ideas and have to answer tough questions about their past activities and statements.

Lack of agreement concerning thoughts and ideas and the clash of these are in no way to be written off as "drama", they are a necessary process in deciding whom we vote for and how we wish Second Pride to develop in the future.

Harmony kills, stifles and blends everything into a grey porridge with fake smiles and fake cordiality! Harmony is also bloody boring!

Should SecondLife be "Pleasantville"?

If you haven't seen or heard about the film "Pleasantville" (url) please read up before continuing.

First of all let me make it completely clear that I am not a behavioral scientist or anything like that. I have, however, in my line of work as a lawyer in first life, dealt with other peoples conflicts all my professional life. And I have had a few in my own personal life too.

I have also been taught by my parents, my community and my schools, to speak up and take a stand if and when I encountered anything I did not agree with. To state my case and share my opinions and arguments.

Taking a stand and showing your position by necessity creates a conflict. In SecondLife every sign of conflict is dismissed and belittled as "drama" and that is viewed as a bad thing.

Especially since I started blogging about my first and second life I have met the attitude "Can´t we always be friends all the time, everyone?". If and when a conflict showed signs of brewing or was becoming apparent I have been told by close friends and people I love and respect, "walk away", "ignore it" or "don´t acknowledge it" or something of that sort.

In my not so humble opinion conflict is drama and conflict is life! The difficult trick is of course to discuss what has been said or done, not what the person saying or doing something is. It does not promote discussion or reaching a consensus to stamp your opponent.with "He/she is stupid", "He/she is a drama queen", "He is a man, all men are animals and always try to oppress me and other women".

Honestly I can say that in all my 42 years in first life I have only one person with whom I have an entrenched and bitter relationship. In my almost five years of SecondLife I have strangely enough succeeded in accumulating four such relationships through - from my point of view - personal attacks on myself or someone I love. I am sure that the opponent has the reversed view.

I would hate to live in a world of fake harmony and stifling pleasantness, but it would be great if we could acknowledge that conflict is healthy, beneficial, creative and absof***inglutely sane! Conflict forces us to rethink our values, find solutions, forgive and all-in-all evolve as human beings by taking a position and saying what way we want to move. By individual evolution we help the society we live in to evolve and become a better place.

My response to my own initial question is therefore a resounding, Hell no!

But the difference between me and those seeking a drama free and pleasant second life could be that they are just in it for a few hours of entertainment, while to me it actually is a second life. I´m not sure.