Friday, January 30, 2015

Sudden Cardiac Arrest

The cause of death that will appear on my dad's death certificate will be "Sudden Cardiac Arrest".

There are several possible reasons for SDA, Whatever the reason may have been in my dad's case will remain unknown as the doctor has kindly decided to follow the request of my mothers, my sister and myself, not to perform an autopsy.

We have spent time together in the immediate family and have tried to focus on the immediate practical issues that a death causes. Everyone who should be informed, has been informed. We have also made an appointment with the undertaker designated by my father and are to meet with him on Sunday to go through the practical arrangements of the funeral in accordance with my fathers wishes.

Dad has left exact instructions about how he wanted things to be done and they will be followed to the letter. He wanted to be cremated and then placed in a memorial grove without any ceremonies, songs or speeches. 

As I understand it the family is never allowed to be present when the mortal remains are placed in a memorial grove so as not to know the exact spot. We have decided as a family, despite some initial objections by my mother, that we can live with that arrangement.

My mother is restless and has - like me - not been able to process the event fully yet, but both of us will get there in time. I am not going to try to force it anymore. What will be, will be.

One thing I have learned these past days, is how helpful and calming it is for the immediate family that the deceased has left clear instructions concerning their wishes. Whenever a question has arisen concerning something, we have gone to my fathers documents and found the answer there.

I have promised myself that I am going to start jotting down my own wishes in the event that something happens, both concerning burial arrangements and everything else that my survivors may need, including a letter to Linden Lab with a will concerning my wishes regarding my SecondLife "assets". One never knows when death strikes and we cannot always delay until we feel it is upon us.

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

I Don't Drink

I don't drink much alcohol and usually don't like the feeling of being drunk, but today I am making an exception.

As every decent Swede I do have a stash of Swedish snaps in my freezer and I am going through it all, not that it is helping me any - yet. I have already drunk 20 cl and a still not connecting to my feelings - but there is still more in my freezer...

35 cl and counting and still I don't feel shit all...
45 cl and I still don't feel anything. Why can't I feel it? The most important man in my life died and still I don't feel anything at all? He loved me no matter what, why can't  I feel anything?

Dad Dies

I was at a conference in Stockholm today when I was reached by the sudden and unexpected news that my father had passed away.

Although dad was 84 years old, he had no known major health issues that could cause his death and he had all senses intact. However, his knees were worn out so that he had had difficulties lately with standing, rising and walking.

This morning he had been to the toilet and got stuck sitting there because he couldn't raise himself up, his legs would not carry him. The home helpers who were there couldn't help him either, so they called an ambulance for assistance in getting him off the toilet and into a  chair.

When the ambulancemen arrived and started helping him dad joked with them about the slightly embarrassing situation they found him in, which was rather typical of him.

As the ambulancemen started to help dad he suddenly went limp and pale. The ambulancemen noticed at once and put him on the floor to perform CPR. They managed to get his heart beating, but it stopped again while he was being transported to the ER. The staff at the hospital also managed to start it once more, but it stopped soon after that.

I am in a daze right now and sort of cut-off from my emotions. It all happened so out-of-the-blue. We have strong hearts in my paternal family and my father never had any sign of troubles with his heart.

My father leaves behind his loving family consisting of his wife of 65 years, a daughter and a son, grandchildren, great grandchildren, a sister and two brothers.

He will always be remembered for his love and care of his family, kindness and good sense of humor.

P.S. I thought that writing about this would provoke me to feel that it actually has happened and that I would finally be able to handle it in an appropriate way (which is sometimes the case), but no such luck. I still cannot fell anything at all...

Saturday, January 24, 2015

Picture of the Day - 275

Small Spaces, Big Comforts
"Small Spaces, Big Comforts" by Hephaesteon

If you wish to see more of Hephaesteon's photography, please visit his Flickr photostream here.

Shake It Off

This police in Dover County in Delaware was really shaking it all off on Taylor Swift's No 1 hit single.

A dash-cam filmed policeman Jeff Davies, 19-year veteran miming along, shaking his head and even breaking with the rules to move his hands from between the 10 and 2 o'clock position. 

Jeff is a 48-year-old father of four know's Swift's hit tune so well because of his 10-year-old daughter.

25,136,573 hits on YouTube and counting...

Friday, January 23, 2015

SL Photography - February 2015

The February 2015 issue of the SecondLife monthly magazine Photography is out.

To view it please go here: SL Photography Monthly - February 2015 Issue.