I would like to think that I have friendly relations with most of the people I have encountered during those many years, some are still close, others I meet sporadically but for various reasons our paths have mostly parted, some have more or less or altogether left SecondLife and some I don't have contact with even if they are still around. But those that we are friends with or have amicable relations with are never the problem, are they?
The relationships that drain my energy, and that I have been thinking much about the last two weeks, are the failed ones. Those relationships that have to some degree turned into open or concealed enmity. I find that it weighs down on me and makes me weary to keep track of the perceived wrongdoings and insults. It has also to some degree turned into an unwanted bitterness on my part that I do not at all care for.
So today I am going to clean the slate by unilaterally forgiving those I feel have wronged me - or someone I love - intentionally or through carelessness, so that I thereby in time can forget the perceived insults and abuses. I am also asking those whom I know feel that I have wronged them for forgiveness. I am going to unblock all those that have previously been blocked from Instant Messaging me in-world or from entering my home sim or on social media sites.
I know that this action will most likely be labeled as "drama" by some, but I don't care one iota because I am doing it for my own sake not anyone else's. My forgiveness is in no manner dependent on the their willingness to forgive me.
As I do not believe a sweeping apology is enough I am going to name each and every one of those I believe deserve my forgiveness and whose forgiveness I need for my words and actions in the past. I will not go into my reasons for feeling hurt by those named, except in one particular case.
I forgive you, Ars Northmead, for dying and leaving me alone and heartbroken for such a long time. I also ask your forgiveness for resenting you for something you could not help. You know I love you, babe, and I know you loved me. Forgiving you was and is always easy.
I forgive you, Andrey Messmer (a. k. a. D R E Y Messmer), and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, Martial Eisenhart, and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, Butch Horton, and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, Vanadis Falconer, and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, Sjöfn Stoneshield, and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, Kynlif Leikfang, and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, Loo Berensohn, and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, PetGirl Bergman (a.k.a. Tina Dahl), and ask for your forgiveness.
I forgive you, Alessia Kranfel (a.k.a. Vesper Kling and Mera Kranfel) and ask for your forgiveness.
Lastly I forgive myself.
---
The deed is done and now the rest of my life can start afresh. It is a big relief!
