Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts
Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts

Saturday, August 1, 2015

Dear Bock: Bodily Fluids?

Dear Bock,

I hear you are the relationship expert. My husband "Fredericko" (I changed the names to protect the innocent, or to not have him find out) has some peculiar interests in the boudoir. He likes me to be sticky and will not offer a warm moist washcloth after love making nor will he allow me to shower. Should I be concerned? Is this the beginning of some kinky sex play that I should run away from? Please help.


Sincerely,
Sticky House Husband Brad


Dear Brad,

Ahhh the eternal question about bodily fluids and their permissibility or not in sexual relations. 

Body fluids are liquids secreted or excreted from our living bodies (among others breast milk, blood, feces, pus, saliva, semen, smegma, sweat, tears, urine, vaginal secretions and vomit etc). All body fluids can carry STDs, so should not be entertained with someone whose serostatus is unknown. 

I always say, if both participants are consenting adults who want it or are OK with it, just go for it. If one wants it and the other doesn't, you have a problem that needs to be communicated and solved. 

No one should suffer during sexual activities or be forced to do something they do not want, it should all be about fun, enjoyment and - for most of us - expressing your love or warm delightful feelings. 

If your lover likes you "sticky" after your lovemaking while you find it absolutely abhorrent, try talking about it and negotiate it to something that is acceptable for both of you. A good start could be if you agreed to try lying on your back and thinking of the Empire for 5-10 minutes before rushing to the showers the next 3-5 times you have sex. Then again, if it is something absolutely unthinkable for you, a determined "No!" should suffice and no trials are needed.

If that works out for the two of you, then consider gradually increasing the time. If you still find it totally unacceptable, then you need to drop that activity and find other venues. The landscape of sexual activities is a wonderfully abundant smorgasbord to pick and choose from, there will be things you both will enjoy.

ADDENDUM & EDIT: Initially I had written a summary here of my own personal likes and dislikes concerning the listed body fluids, which I have on later revision decided to remove as it could be perceived as judgemental.

Suffice it to say, if I had a lover who wanted to run to the shower immediately after orgasm, I would most definitely be bothered, disturbed and insulted. But that's just my personal tastes...

Bock McMillan is a blogger, not a relationship expert, his weekly column "Dear Bock" should therefore merely be considered as his point-of-view on relationship matters. If you wish to get his reaction to a relationship question you have, you are welcome to send an email to lundamats@gmail.com. Remember to write "Dear Bock" in the subject line.

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Pensive

It usually works the other way around, I post from the blog to Facebook, but today I am posting a Bitstrip I made on Facebook to my blog.
It all started this morning, when I received an offline message to my email from an old and dear friend in SecondLife that disturbed me a lot. When I tried to respond to the message on Facebook, I got this when I tried to locate the friend.

It seems I have hurt or crossed the person so much that I have been blocked. Instead I sent my friend an email responding to some of the issues that were raised in the offline message.

The whole incident has sent me into a self-doubting mood and I am wondering what I could have done or should not have done for things to end up this way.

However, I am hoping we can talk it through in-world (I do not yet know if I have been blocked there also or not) and iron out any misunderstandings between us. This is surely a friend I would hate to lose.

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Menwear Fashion Week 2014

This event started already yesterday, but there seems to have been some serious communication issues in getting the news out... At least I did not see a single word concerning it until I got an invitation yesterday to come to a SL Live Radio gig there.

Well, live and learn! Anyhow here is the landmark to Menswear Fashion Week 2014 (SLurl).and here is the link to the blog Menswear Fashion Week 2014 - Blog

SATURDAY April 26th, 2014
11am-12pm SL Chic Zafari @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
2-3pm SL E-Clipse Designs, Champagne Sparkling Fashion, Dot-Be, Madrid Solo, Contraption Group Show
6-7pm SL Rfyre @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show

SUNDAY April 27th, 2014
11am-12pm SL Zed Sensations @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
2-3pm SL INNUENDO at MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
6-7pm SL Aitui, 69 Park Ave, Costa Creations, G&D The Italian Store, JFL Men’s Hats, Dynasty Group Show

MONDAY April 28th, 2014
11am-12pm SL Vitamen, White Widow, Riaxik, HOTDIVE, Zibska, Stone by Phe, Amacci Group Show
2-3pm SL Xiaj @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
6-7pm SL Central Park Fashion Show

TUESDAY April 29th, 2014
11am-12pm Blvck Anchor @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
2-3pm SL Clef De Peau @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show

WEDNESAY April 30th, 2014
11am-12pm SL Wall Street Fashion Show
2-3pm SL iLLMATIC, UNORTHODOX, Akeyo, Feel, !Bravura Homme, J&A Rock Culture Group Show
6-7pm SL Peka’s Design @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show

FRIDAY May 2nd, 2014
11am-12pm SL Pure Poison @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
2-3pm SL Countdown @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
6-7pm SL Image Factory @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show

SATURDAY May 3rd, 2014
11am-12pm SL Faster Pussycat/Velvet Elvis @ MWFW 2014 Fashion Show
12-2pm SL ModeLS Magazine Closing Party
2-3pm SL *just BECAUSE*,Zanze, SORGO, Atelier m+, Cashmere & Keane, Jeepers Creepers, SF Designs Group Show
6-7pm SL Broadway Baby Fashion Show

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Premium Designers:
Akeruka
Blvck Anchor
Chic Zafari
Countdown
Gabriel
Image Factory
Pure Poison
Rfyre
XIAJ
Zed Sensations

MWFW 2014 Designers:
[ BarmaleY]
[sYs]
(red) Sand
*Just BECAUSE*
-Instinct- Clothes
69 Park Ave
Aitui
Akeyo
Amacci
Atelier m+
Body Factory
Bravura! Homme
CHAMPAGNE!Sparkling Fashion
Clef de Pea
Contraption
Costa Creations
David Heather
Dot-Be
Dynasty
E-Clipse
Faster Pussycat & Velvet Elvis
Feel
Frontline
G&D The Italian Store
HOTDIVE
HUMANOID
iLLMATIC
INNUENDO
Instinct Clothes
J&A Rock Culture
Jeepers Creepers
JFL Men’s Hats
Madrid Solo
Miss. C
N1CO
PeKaS Design
Riaxik
S O R G O ♛
SF Design
STONE by Phe
Swagga
UNORTHODOX
Vengeful Threads
Vexing
Vitamen
White Widow
Zakar & ZOOM
Zanze
Zentro
zibska


Saturday, January 25, 2014

Goodbye Rodvik!

Yesterday the part of the metaverse which focuses on SecondLife exploded with the news that Rod Humble, formerly known also known as Rodvik Linden, is no longer CEO of Linden Lab (The Makers of SecondLife).

This change first became known through a private message Rod sent to blogger Jo Yardley (Jo Yardley's Second Life (url)) on Facebook yesterday, where he informed her that he had "left Linden Lab last week". A short while later he posted the following message on his timeline on Facebook.


My first reaction to this rather surprising news was to check Linden Lab's (url) webpage, and sure enough, Rod Humble was no longer listed as one of the company's management.

It seemed rather amateurish to me that no official announcement about the change had been made - and still hasn't, but then I remembered that no announcement has ever been made by the company concerning my Philip - to some of you better known as Philip Rosedale - stepping down as Chairman of the Board. Linden Lab seems to really need someone with skills in communication.

However, I would like to thank Rod for all the improvements that have been made during his three years as CEO and  like my darling Sergeant of Arms sirhc DeSantis in a comment concerning the news on New World Notes (url) I say "Best of luck to (you Rod). Now...who wants to step up to be vilified next (because we are so supportive are we not =^^= )"

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Thought of the Day II

High hopes lead to a state of permanent dissatisfaction. Lowering your expectations gives room for pleasant surprises.

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I once used to think I was quite good at communicating my thoughts, feelings and ideas, but suddenly I again find myself in constant conflicts with individuals around me. Not the people I care about, but still... it irritates and confuses me.