I Was Also Unfriended by Ziggy

"I cleared my friends list of these blood suckers so I could move on and start fresh without hiding as an alt. They just can't seem to get me off their minds the poor little teatsy flies.", said by Ziggy Starsmith on his blogpost today.

Photo by Ziggy Starsmith

It is of course everyone's prerogative to choose whom they they wish to have on their friends list in SecondLife or not.

When someone told me a couple of days ago that Ziggy had trashed them, I checked my own friends list and discovered I had also been trashed, along with my husband Tomais. 

I sent Ziggy an IM, in which I told him that I had seen that he had trashed our friendship and that I was sorry to see him go. I also wished him well for the future. I wouldn't call it "whining", but it seems that Ziggy does.

Of course I would never wish to remain on someones friends list if they consider me to be a whining blood sucker who prevents them from living their SecondLife as they wish. Should anyone ever feel this way about me, I hope they will do as Ziggy and trash our friendship at once.

The Peril of Facebook Likes

Yesterday I lost a longtime friend because I had "liked" a comment on Facebook that the person did not agree with. The fact that I had also "liked" the original post which the person commenting disagreed with, did not help in salvaging the situation.

I was informed that my liking of the egregious comment was such a misdeed that it was the final straw - we have had a rather strained relationship lately - which made it abundantly clear to my former friend that we no longer have anything in common.

Do you wonder what important political, religious, moral or ethical issue was being discussed in the post and in the comments to it that it could lead to such a disastrous result? Well, it was basically a difference of opinion on the culling of friends lists in SecondLife and how to go about doing it.

Culling My Friends List

Perhaps I was inspired by my recent experience of being removed from a friends list, but I have now done the same thing with my own.

When going through my friends list before starting the culling, I noticed that I had been removed from others friends lists already, most notable was my removal by the now abdicated queen of Swedish SecondLife which quite possibly was due to an altercation concerning whether I - as a "Friendly helper" in her group - should do as she ordered me or follow my own discretion. I am well aware that my kind manners sometimes misleads people into thinking that I am submissive, but frankly I do not take orders well so I left that group, thus relieving myself of any duties or obligations in the group she had created.

I have not culled my friends list for a very long time, except about a year and a half ago when I removed one person by accident and another by design. The thing that happened then was that I intended to remove a certain person but for some reason beyond me - possibly someone logging in or out of SecondLife - ended up removing the queen of a neighboring Scandinavian country in SecondLife by mistake.

When I immediately called her in Instants Message to explain my mistake the queen was naturally enraged by my action. She did not at all  believe my protestations and assurances that her removal was a mistake. I have learned that it is futile to discuss such matters further while someone is still furious so I left it at that, although I had first called her up to add her as a friend again.

So learning from previous mistakes and after due consideration I started on removing people from my list. The criterias for removing that I had made up in my mind were the following:

• I do not know who the person was
• I cannot remember ever communicating with the person.
• I have not had any communications with the person during the last three (3) years.
• The person has blocked me from seeing when they are in-world (2 persons).
• The person is a bastard that I will not wish to communicate with in the future(3 person).

Reasons to keep someone on the list inspite of the above criterias being met:

• The person is one I have a strong sentimental attachment to although he never logs in anymore (1 person)

Following the criterias I - carefully making sure I got the correct person - started removing people. I have now successfully concluded this project and have cut my friends list down from 278 to 149 persons. I find it to be a great relief and much less stressful to see only people I care about on my list.

If you still see me on your list, Congratulations! You're still in the running to be Southern Charms next Royal Consort.

And if you don't see me on your list anymore, Congratulations, you are rid of me! I hope you have a happy and fulfilling SecondLife.

If you wish to appeal the decision please send your written appeal in triplicate to
Supreme Court of the United States
1 First Street, NE
Washington, DC 20543