I Am an American

For at least twenty minutes today, while listening to  President Barack Obama´s second inaugural address, I did become an American.

He had me from the get go; when he quoted the first line of the American Constitution "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."

That quote is one of the most beautiful and hopeful I have ever seen in any founding document and Obama filled it with even more passion and life and hope.

I have always wanted and expected from my leaders that they be filled with a vision and passion and that they are able to instill that vision and passion in me and all around me. What I have gotten from Swedish politicians the last twenty years is base economics and nitty gritty-hopelessness. Give me what I need, hope, vision, passion and a social consciousnesses and I will follow. Of course economic realities must be handled in a responsible way, but that should never be the only point - or even the main point.

For twenty minutes I became an American and proud of it. I was filled with hope for the future and our ability to handle the problems we would meet together. 

On "Word Verification"

I have just managed to leave a comment on another blog. It took me seven (7) attempt to get the comment posted because the bloggers had chosen to avert spam-comments by activating "Word Verification" on their blog.

As some of you may know my vision is impaired, by congenital hyperopia and by emerging cataracts, making it almost impossible for me to interpret the blurry images of street numbers and intricately interwoven letters and numbers that must be entered to get a comment published.

After my horrible experience today I have decided that bloggers who choose to activate word verification on their blogs will no longer be worthy of my wisdom or wit.

In my own experience Blogger already recognizes 90-95 % of the spam-comments and the few that slip through are easily removed so I cannot really see any valid reason for activating that silly option.

Cool, Calm & Collected™

After the latest scare, where I went frantic and saw myself with a white cane trying to find my way through the winding and cobbled streets of my beloved hometown, not being able to read, write, drive or watch movies, television or SecondLife I today digested the news and realized that the danger was not imminent.

There will be ample time to take action and find solutions because I will not become totally blind within the next few weeks or even the next few months. There is time to consider options like suicide, surgery or support from a set of beautiful and reliable twins to steer me through my everyday life and cater to my wishes or needs.

It is time for a new beginning, a change! From this day on the laird will personify the phrase "cool, calm and collected". No more histrionics, outbursts or antics, just a calm and slightly aloof attitude to whatever may happen.

Artwork: Nils von Dardel, The Waterfall.

Diagnosis: Cataract

So, after various examinations today the ophthalmologist diagnosed me as having an onset of cataract.

A cataract is a clouding of the lens in the eye that affects vision. Cataracts are usually a result of denaturation of lens protein which causes a clouding that develops in the crystalline lens of the eye or in its envelope (lens capsule), varying in degree from slight to complete opacity and obstructing the passage of light. The disease is "age-related" in the sense that most people over 70 have it to some degree, but the onset can start as early as in the 30´s or 40´s.

Symptoms include

• Being sensitive to glare (Yes)
• Cloudy, fuzzy, foggy, or filmy vision (Yes)
• Difficulty seeing at night or in dim light (Yes)
• Double vision (Yes)
• Loss of color intensity (Not that I have noticed yet)
• Problems seeing shapes against a background or the difference between shades of colors (Not that I have noticed yet)
• Seeing halos around lights (Not that I have noticed yet)

However, the doctor told me that "my cataract" was not so far gone that I would be considered for surgery - yet. The development of cataract varies, some are faster and some are slower, so at this point we wait and see. The fact that I have only one usable eye is a factor that may merit an earlier operation.

This totally sucks!

The Weekend of Headaches

I have been suffering from a severe, throbbing and head splitting headache since Friday afternoon. Heavy medication with painkillers has not helped much but for a few hours today I was able to log inworld.

These headaches are not unfamiliar to me, I can remember having them from time to time ever since puberty, perhaps even before that. Usually the headaches respond well to painkillers - if I take take the pills in time. This time the headache did not go away completely it only varied in force.

The last few months I have also noticed a recurrence of diplopia (double vision), mostly when reading but at other occasions also. When I look at a text or a picture I see a shadow image next to it, the condition is accentuated when I am tired. The shadow image can sometimes be so bad that everything goes blurry. This problem is actually a complete mystery to me as I can only see clearly with one eye, the other one only works for peripheral vision as I cannot consciously control its focal point.

At my last visit with my sweet Hungarian doctor I asked for a referral to an ophthalmologist, which he was kind to grant me. I have an appointment for tomorrow at 11 AM. Hopefully I will learn if something can be done about it all.

The Weekend of Headaches

I have been suffering from a severe, throbbing and head splitting headache since Friday afternoon. Heavy medication with painkillers has not helped much but for a few hours today I was able to log inworld.

These headaches are not unfamiliar to me, I can remember having them from time to time ever since puberty, perhaps even before that. Usually the headaches respond well to painkillers - if I take take the pills in time. This time the headache did not go away completely it only varied in force.

The last few months I have also noticed a recurrence of diplopia (double vision), mostly when reading but at other occasions also. When I look at a text or a picture I see a shadow image next to it, the condition is accentuated when I am tired. The shadow image can sometimes be so bad that everything goes blurry. This problem is actually a complete mystery to me as I can only see clearly with one eye, the other one only works for peripheral vision as I cannot consciously control its focal point.

At my last visit with my sweet Hungarian doctor I asked for a referral to an ophthalmologist, which he was kind to grant me. I have an appointment for tomorrow at 11 AM. Hopefully I will learn if something can be done about it all.