Dear Bock: Bodily Fluids?

Dear Bock,

I hear you are the relationship expert. My husband "Fredericko" (I changed the names to protect the innocent, or to not have him find out) has some peculiar interests in the boudoir. He likes me to be sticky and will not offer a warm moist washcloth after love making nor will he allow me to shower. Should I be concerned? Is this the beginning of some kinky sex play that I should run away from? Please help.

Sincerely,
Sticky House Husband Brad

Dear Brad,

Ahhh the eternal question about bodily fluids and their permissibility or not in sexual relations. 

Body fluids are liquids secreted or excreted from our living bodies (among others breast milk, blood, feces, pus, saliva, semen, smegma, sweat, tears, urine, vaginal secretions and vomit etc). All body fluids can carry STDs, so should not be entertained with someone whose serostatus is unknown. 

I always say, if both participants are consenting adults who want it or are OK with it, just go for it. If one wants it and the other doesn't, you have a problem that needs to be communicated and solved. 

No one should suffer during sexual activities or be forced to do something they do not want, it should all be about fun, enjoyment and - for most of us - expressing your love or warm delightful feelings. 

If your lover likes you "sticky" after your lovemaking while you find it absolutely abhorrent, try talking about it and negotiate it to something that is acceptable for both of you. A good start could be if you agreed to try lying on your back and thinking of the Empire for 5-10 minutes before rushing to the showers the next 3-5 times you have sex. Then again, if it is something absolutely unthinkable for you, a determined "No!" should suffice and no trials are needed.

If that works out for the two of you, then consider gradually increasing the time. If you still find it totally unacceptable, then you need to drop that activity and find other venues. The landscape of sexual activities is a wonderfully abundant smorgasbord to pick and choose from, there will be things you both will enjoy.

ADDENDUM & EDIT: Initially I had written a summary here of my own personal likes and dislikes concerning the listed body fluids, which I have on later revision decided to remove as it could be perceived as judgemental.

Suffice it to say, if I had a lover who wanted to run to the shower immediately after orgasm, I would most definitely be bothered, disturbed and insulted. But that's just my personal tastes...

Bock McMillan is a blogger, not a relationship expert, his weekly column "Dear Bock" should therefore merely be considered as his point-of-view on relationship matters. If you wish to get his reaction to a relationship question you have, you are welcome to send an email to lundamats@gmail.com. Remember to write "Dear Bock" in the subject line.

Second Pride, Annual Meeting - Saturday August 1 @ 12 PM SLT

From a group notice in the Second Pride Festival group.

Please be informed the Board of Directors of Second Pride will hold their "Annual General Meeting (AGM)" in the Second Pride Headquarters Conference Hall (SLurl) on Saturday August 1, 2015, 12:00 PM SLT.

The proposed agenda for the meeting is as follows

1. Call To Order
2. Department Reports
    - Chair
    - Build
    - Events
    - Community Relations
    - Security
    - Treasurer Report
    - IT
3. Elections Procedures
4. Adjourn

Mother

I just got off the phone with my mother. She called me, crying, and told me she could not take it any longer."He didn't sleep here last night and he hasn't been home all day. He must be with her, I don't understand why he is doing this to me..."

The man she is talking about is my father, who passed away on January 28, 2015.

I tried to get mother calm. I reminded her that she was there when father died and saw when he was given CPR and when he took his last breath. "Yes", she confirmed "I remember all that, but where are these strange thoughts coming from? Why am I thinking of this woman and there being something to do with your father?" We talked on about how they had been married for almost 65 years. How my father loved her very much, and she him from the beginning when they met until the end. How he never ever slept away from her during all those years, if he could help it.

Mother was calm again when we finished and was going to bed, because she was feeling very tired.

I can with absolute knowledge say, that if my father had had an affair and had moved out of the house we in the family would all know. Mine is not a family in which one is allowed to keep such things secret, not for very long and we all get involved in the end - always.

This has been going on for about six weeks, not constantly, but from time to time. At first we - my older sister and I - didn't understand what the hell was going on and we put it down to grief. After a while we were told that hallucinations and a change of mental status sometimes can be the only visible symptoms of a urinary tract infection (UTI) in elderly people.

Last Friday I took my mother to the doctor for a checkup. The checkup showed no signs of a UTI so that wasn't the cause of the strange thoughts. What was discovered through a blood count test was that my mother had acute anemia. Her hemoglobin count was only 72 g/L (normal (121 to 151 g/L). The doctor believed that this could - possibly - account for mother's strange thoughts and hallucinations.

Mother was immediately admitted to hospital, with many protests and the promise it would only be overnight, and was given three bags of blood.

The reason for the anemia still remains unclear and is going to be investigated without hospitalization, as that is the only way my mother will accept.

It would seem that the blood transfusions haven't helped, not yet anyway. The whole thing makes me very sad and unhappy.

SL Photography - August 2015

The August 2015 issue of the SecondLife monthly magazine Photography is out.

To view it please go to: SL Photography Monthly - August 2015 Issue.

Stockholm Pride, July 27 - August 1, 2015

It's time again for my friend Apmel's neighbours to raise the Pride-flag.

Stockholm Pride, the largest Pride-festival in Scandinavia, started today and ends on Saturday.

For more information about this event, please visit the official website Stockholm Pride (English).

Account for AFC Donations at The Pool Party

This is an account for the donations made at the pool party at Southern Charm on Saturday July 25, 2015.

As always you can click on the pictures to enlarge them.

There were three donation boxes at the venue, each received donations of L$11,367, L$10,750 and L$10,100 respectively, which makes a grand total of L$32,487.

L$32,487 converts to US$131.53.

US$131.53 have today been forwarded to The Ali Forney Center, below is a picture of the PDF I received acknowledging the donation of that amount.

JJ's Pictures From The Pool Party

My sweet brother JJ Goodman has published these great pictures from yesterdays pool party of F*c*book. With his kind permission I post them here also.

As always you can enlarge the pictures by clicking on them.

Tomais and I would like to thank everyone who was there for making it such a great time. We are aware that some of you could not stay long because of the lag, but thanks for trying.

We would also like to thank our friends DJ Kahvy and his host Garrett, a.k.a. The Smith Boys, for helping us in making this a wonderful party. Thanks also to my brother Dejerrity Mycron for proving "Top Security" at the event, despite constant crashing.

We thank all of you for your generous donations to The Ali Forney Center (post on proceeds and forwarding to AFC to follow)

For more pictures from the party, please visit my friend Apmel Goosson's blog My Avatar's Name Is Apmel: At the Pool Party on Southern Charm.

Madonna in Concert@Provincetown

From a press release. 

"It is Provincetown's 9th Anniversary.  Provincetown (PTOWN) is the oldest LGBT friendly sim in Second Life.  To kick off a week of celebrations, "Madonna : The Virtual History Tour" will be in concert tomorrow (Sunday July 26, 2015) at 1PM SLT.

New numbers, new sets, hot dancers, and of course Madge herself!  Come join us as we celebrate Ptown and rock out to Madonna!

P.S. Please avoid scripts (shoes, hairs, clothes)

Join us, Sunday July 26, 2015 at 1PM SLT"

Historic Provincetown sim - Madonna Concert (SLurl)