Soon after I had logged into
SecondLife on February 12, 2010, my beautiful
Ars also logged in.
After we had said our hellos, he asked me to check my email. When I asked why, he told me
"Just check it now, Bock!"
As I opened the mail a message popped up from SecondLife which read:
"Dear Bock McMillan,
You have received a Second Life partner proposal from Ars Northmead.
Please visit the link below to view the proposal:
https://secure-web39.secondlife.com/my/account/partners.php
This proposal will expire on Friday, February 19, 2010."
I was totally elated and hurried to go to the SecondLife website to accept the proposal. When I have done that I got the message "Congratulations Bock McMillan you have now entered into a partnership with Ars Northmead!"
I was both laughing and crying with joy when I came back to my Ars, because this had been a very surprising move on his part after more than two years together. Both of us had often declared a rather skeptical and dim view on SecondLife partnerships, after seeing some acquaintances going through a series of partnerships that never lasted for long. However, we both believed that with our long past together we would do a better job of it so we spent a very happy day together.
Not too long after this Ars went missing for a few days. I could not reach him either by e-mail or any of his phones. Those days were awful and I was very worried for him. When I finally got hold of him again it turned out that Ars´s father had found him in a very poor and weakened state and had taken him to the parents house so they could look after him.
Ars still had a fever and sounded very weak when I talked with him, but he told me he was going to the hospital for a check-up the next day. At the same time I talked with Ars sisters and they promised to keep me updated on Ars condition.
The medical examination the next day showed that Ars had double pneumonia and was in a terribly weak state so the doctors admitted him for further care and treatment. Although the doctors were hopeful in the beginning this changed when complications set in and Ars passed away on March 12, 2010, exactly one month after we had been partnered.
About a fortnight after Ars had passed away I was asked (for the first time), "Do you think Ars married you because he knew he was going to die?" The question really surprised me because it hadn't even crossed my mind and was blurted out by someone not close to either of us. I just told the person "No! Please don´t talk to me ever again."
However the question made me think if that could be the case. The following occasions I was asked the same question - in kinder ways and by people who mattered - I was better prepared.
I have told those who asked, that I honestly do not believe that Ars knew he was even sick, let alone would be dead soon, when he proposed to me. After a few months of pain and agony due to a broken femur things had actually just started looking up for him again. He had signed up for a gym to get back in shape and we had also begun discussing some changes on the sim. At the time of the proposal Ars was happier again. More than anything I felt like I had passed some sort of test, by sticking with him and supporting him through the bad time that he had just gone through.
We were happy together and no one will ever convince me of anything else. This was, is and will always remain a happy day for me!
The pictures of Ars in this post were taken in December 2009 by Kent Hutchinson of KH Photography.